I don't know if people even read my blog but that's okay, because it's kind of supposed to be a place for me to think and reflect anyway. On the bright side, I HAVE A WHOLE 84 VIEWS!!! I haven't written in such a long time but things got really busy with school, Kyle and my sorority so I didn't really have time to update my blog. Today's post is going to be comparatively lighthearted in relation to my other posts about race dynamics and structural inequality and all that good stuff because I'm going to be talking about my Tinder experience.
I downloaded Tinder around May of my first year in college (so thats May 2014), as a result of me perpetually complaining about being single and seeing happy couples and my best friend at the time literally taking my phone and downloading it for me just to cease my complaining. The first message I got was something like "hey girl let me eat my way from your pussy to your heart" - not exactly the best way to start off but I thought the whole idea of it was really interesting (and I was honestly flattered that I was getting matches) so I decided to keep swiping anyway.
Over the summer, I traveled a lot (Seoul, Singapore and then back to California) so I accumulated a lot of matches but never actually met anyone, mainly because 1) I didn't reply to most of the messages I received, 2) I wasn't in a place long enough to meet up with anyone, and 3) I was really afraid to meet a stranger that I met on the Internet. I didn't really have any serious conversations with anyone in particular, and there wasn't anyone that seemed particularly interested in me or that I was particularly interested in so I wasn't really taking it seriously.
Towards the end of summer, I came back to California to start summer school. I was extremely jet lagged having just arrived back from Korea, so I spent a lot of the time in which I couldn't sleep on my phone. Anyway, I was swiping and Kyle's profile came up and he had a bunch of pictures of him in his USMC uniform and I thought he was really cute and attractive, so I swiped right and we matched. Before I continue, I should probably explain that we were able to match because we both had our distances set to a 100 miles radar since he was stationed around 3 hours away from me at the time. I wish I still had screenshots of both our Tinder profiles, because I'm sure they would be hilarious to look back on but alas. Anyway, he messaged me saying something along the lines of "hey, I think your smile is really beautiful. What's your major at UCI?" - which as messages go, is pretty genuine and a decent conversation-starter. Again, I wish I had screenshotted the conversation or something just so we could have something to look back on and laugh at.
After about a week of talking (and by talking I mean very very long text messages being sent throughout the day), Kyle suggested we go on a date near me. I was really excited because it was my first time being asked on a date since like the 8th grade, even if it was by a stranger on the Internet. Even though I had previous qualms about meeting up with strangers on the Internet, we really clicked in our conversations and he seemed like a really decent, nice, genuine and interesting guy. Also, it probably helped a lot that he had the kindest and sweetest face ever so I wasn't all too worried about meeting up with someone who turned out to be an axe murderer.
The night before we were supposed to meet up, I was so nervous I couldn't sleep. I was so worried that this guy that I had connected so well with would find me awkward or ugly in person, and that I would clam up and have nothing to say. Turns out I didn't have much to be worried about. Kyle picked me up at around 11 from my place, and the first thing he said to me was, "Finally, in the flesh!" He was tall and handsome, and the first thing he did was pick me up in a giant bear hug. I was immediately relieved; I didn't think giant bear hugs came naturally to axe murderers.
Naturally, it was a little strange meeting someone you've only seen pictures of and had conversations with online, but it only took us 20 minutes to fall into an organic and enjoyable rhythm of conversation. We both retained information that we had told each other before we had met, and it was honestly like meeting up with an old friend. One of our conversations was about how I killed all my previous plants and pet fish, so we even made a stop at a nearby pet store for a new pet fish (which was named Dr. Fishy and lived for a glorious 8 days). By the time Kyle had to leave for the drive back on base, I was smitten. We even had our next date planned for the next weekend, and he had even asked me to be his date to the USMC Birthday Ball in three months.
I had no idea, upon downloading what I perceived to be a harmless app, that I would find my soulmate. Kyle and I would never have had the opportunity to cross paths without the assistance of a mobile app.
In my experience, Tinder has been what you make of it. It's great because people who want to hook up can find others who are likeminded, while those who are interested in pursuing a relationship can find others who are interested in the same. You get to talk to different people without the hassle of being "involved", seeing as how there is no required commitment you have to strangers on the Internet. Those who are shy may find it easier to approach people online, as opposed to in person - making starting a conversation easier. You get to know someone and maybe even develop feelings for their character and personality, instead of their physical appearance.
I downloaded Tinder around May of my first year in college (so thats May 2014), as a result of me perpetually complaining about being single and seeing happy couples and my best friend at the time literally taking my phone and downloading it for me just to cease my complaining. The first message I got was something like "hey girl let me eat my way from your pussy to your heart" - not exactly the best way to start off but I thought the whole idea of it was really interesting (and I was honestly flattered that I was getting matches) so I decided to keep swiping anyway.
Over the summer, I traveled a lot (Seoul, Singapore and then back to California) so I accumulated a lot of matches but never actually met anyone, mainly because 1) I didn't reply to most of the messages I received, 2) I wasn't in a place long enough to meet up with anyone, and 3) I was really afraid to meet a stranger that I met on the Internet. I didn't really have any serious conversations with anyone in particular, and there wasn't anyone that seemed particularly interested in me or that I was particularly interested in so I wasn't really taking it seriously.
Towards the end of summer, I came back to California to start summer school. I was extremely jet lagged having just arrived back from Korea, so I spent a lot of the time in which I couldn't sleep on my phone. Anyway, I was swiping and Kyle's profile came up and he had a bunch of pictures of him in his USMC uniform and I thought he was really cute and attractive, so I swiped right and we matched. Before I continue, I should probably explain that we were able to match because we both had our distances set to a 100 miles radar since he was stationed around 3 hours away from me at the time. I wish I still had screenshots of both our Tinder profiles, because I'm sure they would be hilarious to look back on but alas. Anyway, he messaged me saying something along the lines of "hey, I think your smile is really beautiful. What's your major at UCI?" - which as messages go, is pretty genuine and a decent conversation-starter. Again, I wish I had screenshotted the conversation or something just so we could have something to look back on and laugh at.
After about a week of talking (and by talking I mean very very long text messages being sent throughout the day), Kyle suggested we go on a date near me. I was really excited because it was my first time being asked on a date since like the 8th grade, even if it was by a stranger on the Internet. Even though I had previous qualms about meeting up with strangers on the Internet, we really clicked in our conversations and he seemed like a really decent, nice, genuine and interesting guy. Also, it probably helped a lot that he had the kindest and sweetest face ever so I wasn't all too worried about meeting up with someone who turned out to be an axe murderer.
The night before we were supposed to meet up, I was so nervous I couldn't sleep. I was so worried that this guy that I had connected so well with would find me awkward or ugly in person, and that I would clam up and have nothing to say. Turns out I didn't have much to be worried about. Kyle picked me up at around 11 from my place, and the first thing he said to me was, "Finally, in the flesh!" He was tall and handsome, and the first thing he did was pick me up in a giant bear hug. I was immediately relieved; I didn't think giant bear hugs came naturally to axe murderers.
Naturally, it was a little strange meeting someone you've only seen pictures of and had conversations with online, but it only took us 20 minutes to fall into an organic and enjoyable rhythm of conversation. We both retained information that we had told each other before we had met, and it was honestly like meeting up with an old friend. One of our conversations was about how I killed all my previous plants and pet fish, so we even made a stop at a nearby pet store for a new pet fish (which was named Dr. Fishy and lived for a glorious 8 days). By the time Kyle had to leave for the drive back on base, I was smitten. We even had our next date planned for the next weekend, and he had even asked me to be his date to the USMC Birthday Ball in three months.
Dr Fishy before his tragic demise
I had no idea, upon downloading what I perceived to be a harmless app, that I would find my soulmate. Kyle and I would never have had the opportunity to cross paths without the assistance of a mobile app.
In my experience, Tinder has been what you make of it. It's great because people who want to hook up can find others who are likeminded, while those who are interested in pursuing a relationship can find others who are interested in the same. You get to talk to different people without the hassle of being "involved", seeing as how there is no required commitment you have to strangers on the Internet. Those who are shy may find it easier to approach people online, as opposed to in person - making starting a conversation easier. You get to know someone and maybe even develop feelings for their character and personality, instead of their physical appearance.
Kyle and I at the USMC ball :)
